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Lying awake worrying. So somewhere, somehow, I've been put in a… - Dont they know? It's the end of the world... [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Alien girl

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[Sep. 21st, 2011|02:34 am]
Alien girl
Lying awake worrying. So somewhere, somehow, I've been put in a fucking horrible situation where, somewhere along the line, I am gonna have to betray someone. The situation it is, I can't not betray one without betraying the other. I have decided to step away completely but it is not that easy. Once you know something, you can choose to ignore it but you can't choose to un-know it. Thing is, it's gonna all surface one day and the fallout is not gonna be pleasant.

I'm quite sure people suspect I know something, even though other people know more than me, I know minor details of this "thing I know" and nothing else, other people know because they've heard it from the horses mouth, not me. Why would I run my mouth without knowing all the facts? I can't really talk to anyone because I don't know who knows what and I refuse to have any complicity in shitstirring and Chinese whispers. Hence why I'm not vocalising any of these worries on Facebook, the media I normally use to get things off my chest.

I'm quite sad. I just want everyone and everything to be ok. I don't want anybody to get hurt but I think it may be likely. I feel I'm in this alone and completely powerless. I don't want people to fight and I don't want to lose any friends just because I know a very basic piece of information. This is what I'm worrying about, not just me, but other people's relationships being destroyed and people getting hurt, but I feel that it's inevitable. I love my friends and I don't believe anyone is to blame and this is just one of them shitty things about life but fuck it's driving me mad :(